There are certain workers upon whom Americans would gladly deposit sheep entrails: trial lawyers, Wall Street bankers, congressmen. Of course, the most virulent contempt has historically been reserved for car salesmen. Which is odd. I love car salesmen. I love their stories, I love their tactics, I love undercoating, I love the occasional sewer transaction, I love their pants. When Saturn announced no-haggle prices, I thought, jeez, there goes half the adventure. I mean, who'd sign up for a safari in which you sit at home and a hardworking Kenyan fellow simply FedExes you a couple of dead lions?
Plus, salesmen afford one of life's chocolate-covered cherries: test-driving someone else's automobile. For free. I made a whole career of it. "You live 80 years," George Carlin said, "and at best…