Innehållsförteckning för January 2017 från Cosmopolitan

SUSPENSE 1. THE SLEEPWALKER by Chris Bohjalian After a chronic sleepwalker goes missing, the general consensus is accidental death. But nothing is what it seems in this gripping mystery. 2. CARVE THE MARK by Veronica Roth The Divergent author is back in a big way with this much-anticipated sci-fi tale about the role of human destiny and fate in a galaxy far, far away. 3. THE GIRL BEFORE by JP Delaney Get hooked on this hair-raiser about a woman who scores what seems like her dream home… until she finds out the mysterious fate of the previous tenant. 4. THIS IS NOT OVER by Holly Brown A nasty review on a vacation rental website sparks a crazy, and also kinda creepy, war between host and renter. Both women are determined to settle the score…

THINK KINK “DNCE fans are going to have fun with our song ‘Be Mean.’ It’s about vibing with somebody— whether you want to be tied up, use some handcuffs, dress up. It’s like our nod to Fifty Shades of Grey, which I actually haven’t seen, but I probably should... for research purposes.” SEX BUCKET LIST “I’ve fooled around in an elevator, but I’ve yet to cross sex in an elevator off the list. There have been bathrooms before. But sex in an airplane bathroom is a hundred percent on my bucket list. Apparently, you can go to jail for it. Maybe slip a hundred to the flight attendant and they’ll be like, ‘I got you, bro.’” RELATIONSHIP RESOLUTIONS “I’ll try to take ladies on dates before introducing them to my…

“One day, I signed on to my Facebook and saw pictures of my ex and his new girlfriend at a Greek event on my timeline. I was confused because I had blocked them both. Then, I saw that it was my mother who had shared the photo. I called her immediately, freaking out, and asked why she posted that. She didn’t even know what photo I was talking about and didn’t know she had shared it. I was mortified.” —LILY P., 21 “My mother was obsessed with Facebook zoo and spent real money buying crops and more animals for her zoo. She would post ‘Can you please feed my crops by clicking on my goat?’ on my friends’ walls.” —STACI F., 29 “My mom follows all my old friends from…

THE TRACKER Stay on top of your goals with just a flick of the wrist. THE SNEAKERS Transition from barre class to brunch in graphic kicks. THE PANTS Strategic side panels draw the eye up and down, adding visual length to your gams. THE EQUIPMENTA Lose count? No sweat. This smart jump rope tracks your stats.…

THE DIFFUSER Emit some lavender or bergamot to lull you into dreamland. THE SOUND MACHINE Choose from 12 soothing, doctorapproved tunes. THE TEA Zen out with an herbal remedy while you wind down your day. THE OILS Place a drop or two on your wrists for instant chill.…

PERFECT A GLOW 1. START WITH SKIN CARE Before you even reach for a highlighter, gently exfoliate and prep with a lightweight moisturizer—smooth, hydrated skin reflects light. 2. USE PRIMER A luminescent one creates the illusion of an inner glow. Have oily skin? Skip the T-zone, a technique makeup artist Vincent Oquendo calls selective highlighting. 3. STIPPLE YOUR FOUNDATION Use quick, dabbing motions with a sponge or f lat-top brush to preserve your primer job. Also important: Use a satin-finish, not matte, formula. 4. HIGHLIGHT STRATEGICALLY Look straight into a mirror and start your highlighter on the tops of your cheekbones, just below the outer edge of your iris, going back to your ear, says Jenny Smith, lead makeup stylist for Nars. “You don’t want to spotlight the pores near…

Boobs seem pretty straightforward (unless yours point east-west, of course). They give you a heads-up when your period’s on the way. They signal when it’s cold. Plus, they do their part when it comes to attracting a crush. But as close as you are to your breast friends, there’s probably a few things even you don’t know about them. So we handed your hooters the mic. Here’s what they want to say. We Can Change Size” Hormone f luctuations during your cycle cause glands in the breast to grow in preparation for a possible pregnancy, leading to swelling and tenderness. In fact, estrogen is also why taking the Pill can result in the (sometimes welcome) side effect of bigger boobs. “Oral contraceptives with higher amounts of estrogen in particular can…

RESOLUTION 1 Have. More. Sex. Because getting it on should happen as often as you damn well please! And research shows having regular sex reduces stress by releasing endorphins and oxytocin—and (get this!) it helps you sleep better, fights off colds, and can even make your skin glowy. So here’s how to put your more-action plan into, well, action. Make Every Day a Foreplay Day It’s no secret among sex experts that extended foreplay leads to satisfying sex and better orgasms for women—score! Sexologist Emily Morse takes it a step further: “We think of foreplay as what we do during the quick buildup to the main event. But it pays to view foreplay as an ongoing seduction that begins immediately after your last orgasm and continues right up until you…

These (non-chain) burger joints are the most popular with guys ages 21 to 35. Now go get up in their grills! BIRMINGHAM, AL Mugshots ANCHORAGE, AK Arctic Roadrunner TEMPE, AZ The Chuckbox LITTLE ROCK, AR Big Orange LOS ANGELES, CA The Apple Pan DENVER, CO Highland Tap and Burger WALLINGFORD, CT Knuckleheads MILFORD, DE Burgers and Beans ORLANDO, FL The Cowfish Sushi Burger Bar ATLANTA, GA Grindhouse Killer Burgers LAHAINA, HI Cool Cat Cafe COEUR D’ALENE, ID Bardenay CHICAGO, IL DMK Burger Bar INDIANAPOLIS, IN Bru Burger Bar DES MOINES, IA Zombie Burger + Drink Lab LAWRENCE, KS The Burger Stand at The Casbah LEXINGTON, KY Tolly-Ho NEW ORLEANS, LA Port of Call PORTLAND, ME Bramhall BALTIMORE, MD Abbey Burger Bistro BOSTON, MA Tasty Burger DETROIT, MI Green Dot Stables…

GRAB a wheel of Asiago, Brie, cheddar, Parmesan, Camembert, or all of the above! National Cheese Lover’s Day is Jan. 20. COLOR in the (lip) lines with Clinique’s brand-new Crayola Chubby Sticks ($17, clinique.com). ROCK luxury designer looks at a major discount with wardroberental app Armarium (armarium.com). SET YOUR SCENT with Fragrance-Lock, and smell divine for up to 12 hours ($34, fragrancelock.com).  DOWNLOAD Nicki Minaj: the Empire gaming app and spread your Pinkprint all over. ACCESSORIZE your fur baby, and Insta the resulting sideeye. National Dress Up Your Pet Day (yep, it’s a thing) is Jan. 14. UPGRADE your fitness-style game in Anna Kaiser’s line for C9 Champion ($20, target.com). COMMIT to feeling great in 2017 with LeafTV’s The Year of Wellness subscription box ($60 per month, leaf.tv).…

Q&A ZARA LARSSON The outspoken Swede behind the smash-hit songs “Lush Life” and “Ain’t My Fault” drops her new album, So Good, this month. ON GOING TO BAT FOR HER FAVE TRACKS: “There’s a song called ‘Mississippi’ about a back-andforth relationship. It’s like you’re counting: One Mississippi, things are good, then two Mississippi, things are bad. It was actually written a couple of years ago, so the song had a big chance of being left off the album, but it just stayed with me.”  NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION: “To always be on time. It never works out. Every January 1, I’m like, ‘Sorry I’m late!’” ON USING HER VOICE: “My parents taught me that it’s okay to question everything. Sometimes, it came back to bite them— if they said I couldn’t…

Cosmo readers reveal their most embarrassing, ridiculous, what-was-Ithinking moments. 1 “I still live at home, and my boyfriend and I were hooking up in the living room. I was pretty sure we cleaned up afterward. But three days later, my mom texted me a pic of the condom wrapper and wrote in all capital letters: No sex on the family couch. I was with my boyfriend when she sent it, and we were both totally embarrassed. He vowed never to come to the house again.” —ASHIA T., 24, MODEL, BROOKLYN, NY WE KNOW YOU HAVE CONFESSIONS TO SHARE.... E-MAIL THE DIRTY DETAILS TO CONFESSIONS@COSMOPOLITAN.COM, OR TWEET YOUR TALES TO @COSMOPOLITAN! 2 “I met this hot football player on campus, and after a few weeks of heavy flirtation, we hooked…

Each month, Cosmo lets one passionate voice sound off if on november 7 you had asked me “What will happen tomorrow?” I would have said that the first female president of the United States would be voted into office by a landslide. And nearly every pollster in the country would have backed up that statement. The data-defying—and to some, devastating—outcome that business tycoon turned reality star turned rogue politician Donald Trump will, in fact, be the next leader of the free world has been dissected to death. The summary conclusion: Trump won his bid largely because of white male enthusiasm (63 percent of white men, and a majority of men overall, voted for him).S But what stuns me is that, while most women voted for Hillary Clinton, we were not…

THE BLAZER Pair your firm handshake with a strong shoulder detail. THE SHOES Skip the stilettos. Mid heels keep you grounded in your interview. THE WATCH A polished style is forever chic and outlasts an iPhone battery.…

BARE BACK Hailey Baldwin Show some skin in a cutout top that works as well for brunch with your girls as it does catching glances at a bar. PERFECT FIT Gigi Hadid Give windchill the finger in a curve-hugging dress with over-the-knee lace-up boots. MATCH UP Bella Hadid The new twinset? An off-theshoulder crop top and “sweats.” Add edge with punk-rock boots and a choker. SHOP THE LOOK…

LIGHT UP This glow-inducing highlighter works better than a LuMee. PALLADIO I’m Glowing Creamy Stick Luminizer, $8, palladiobeauty.com STRIKE GOLD Gilded eyes plus a few coats of mascara equal a supersexy NYE stare. REVLON ColorStay Crème Eye Shadow in Praline, $8, drugstores SPICE GIRL Sex up your shower sesh with this cinnamon-scented soap. SKINNY & CO. Raw Soap in Cinnamon, $10, skinnyand company.com TAKE COVER All-nighter? Layer this peachy crayon under concealer to neutralize shadows. E.L.F. Color Correcting Stick in Peach, $4, elfcosmetics.com NEUTRAL TERRITORY Rock this nude in the office, then pair it with a smoky eye for GNO. IMAN COSMETICS Luxury Matte Lipstick in Indulge, $10, drugstores METAL MANI One coat offers a subtle sheen; two, party-perfect sparkle. FLOSS GLOSS Nail Lacquer in Keys to the Mansion, $8,…

TTHE COMMUNICATION breakdown between the sexes can often be summed up like this: You like to talk about your feelings; he doesn’t. It’s not his fault. “Boys are taught to be less emotionally open than girls,” says Ronald Levant, a professor of psychology at the University of Akron. “They are socialized by their peers and parents never to cry and to embrace traditional norms of masculinity, like being aggressive.” (Those action-hero figures aren’t saving the world by negotiating with the bad guy....) But the era of the man bun has ushered in a willingness on the part of guys to be less guarded. Millennial men are more down for deep conversations with their partner, says Levant, but there are differences in how men and women communicate that can make it…

1. Give Him Ideas Even if guys like a profile, they often hesitate to reach out because they aren’t sure what to say. Make it easy by mentioning the kind of dates you love in your bio. Write: “I’m on a constant quest to find the best gelato in town” or “I never say no to good sushi.” That way, he knows exactly what to suggest when he sends you a message. 2. Slow Down and Be Specific When it comes to dating apps, we tend to have random, rapidfire convos with way too many people. It sucks the fun out of the experience and makes it feel impersonal. Before you fire off another “Hey!” instead try something like, “About to binge on Stranger Things. What about you?” That sort…

Avocados FREEZE ’EM Go ahead, buy those on-sale avocados in bulk. Open them, puree the meat in a blender, then divide by the cupful into freezer-safe plastic bags. Use up to a year later in sauces, smoothies, or dressings. (Thaw first in the fridge.) USE ’EM The brain-healthboosting polyphenols in avocados are what turns them brown, says Drew Ramsey, MD, author of Eat Complete. Don’t forgo the benefits— a smoothie hides the spots. Mix avocado with plain yogurt, milk, spinach, chopped cashews, cocoa powder, and honey in a blender with ice, adding cold water if necessary. TOSS ’EM If they are completely brown or soupy or smell funny Herbs FREEZE ’EM Bought a giant bunch for a recipe that only calls for a couple of sprigs? Chop, then mix ¼…

BEER AND BOOTY • BIRTH CONTROL BENEFITS • LUBES YOU’LL LOVE Q If a guy drinks beer, then goes down on me, can yeast residue in his mouth give me an infection? A Beer can make strange things happen, but this isn’t one of them. There are thousands of strains of yeast in the world, and the kind used in brewing are not the same as those that tend to cause a yeast infection. Plus, the saliva in your partner’s mouth contains powerful enzymes that help kill yeast. If you’re getting yeast infections, worry less about your partner’s drinking and more about the balance of bacteria in your vagina, which can shift with your cycle, when you take antibiotics, and after you wear a damp swimsuit or tight, moist underwear.…

SNOWFLAKE MARTINI Lemon wedge Sugar 1.5 oz. vanilla vodka 1 oz. Godiva white chocolate liqueur .75 oz. white crème de cacao 1 oz. half-and-half Rub a lemon wedge around the rim of a martini glass. Dip the rim in sugar (dust off excess). In a shaker, mix the liquids with ice, then strain into your glass. SILVER LINING Just like a sugared rim makes any drink more festive, cuticle art (it’s a thing!) adds an extraspecial sparkle to your ring stack. STEP 1 Apply two coats of a semi-sheer pink (we’re crushing on JinSoon Nail Lacquer in Muse, $18), followed by a top coat. STEP 2 With a striping brush (try Sally Hansen’s I Heart Nail Art Tool Kit, $6), trace a thin line of silver glitter polish (a chunky…

THE MOTIVATOR Mallory Brown Social entrepreneur and director of the CrowdRise 24-Hour Impact Project PLATFORM: CrowdRise RAISED: $228,912 Mallory Brown, 30, has always been happiest living out of her backpack. After studying economics and management in college, she took time to trek through Southeast Asia and South America. The more she traveled, the more she wanted to find a way to connect her wanderlust to her skill set. That led her to founding a company that provides clothes to people in need as well as consulting with global charities. “I thought that I could use my training, resources, and access to connect businesses and donors with people who need help,” she says. In January 2015, she traveled to Haiti to deliver clothing to people still affected by the devastating 2010…

Enlist a Pickpocket If hoarding money feels boring, save it before you see it. Send part of your pay to savings before it hits your checking account, and if possible, ask that half of any raise go to your 401(k). “You won’t feel the loss of a smaller paycheck, because you never had it to begin with,” says Douglas Hough, PhD, an economist at the Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health. If you are paid in cash, set a monthly auto-transfer from checking to savings. Or download Digit, an app that notes your spending habits and then siphons small amounts of money into the app’s savings account. Carry a Savings Charm Ads, e-mail promos, store signs: You’re bombarded by cues to spend but rarely to save. Try creating your…

THE YEAR OF COMFORT Want game-changing comfort that lasts all day, with no lens care required? Just remove your DAILIES TOTAL 1® contact lenses at night, put a fresh pair in every morning, and you’re ready to go! dailiestotal1.com CALLING ALL SOCIAL MEDIA SUPERSTARS! Cosmo is looking for talented up-and-coming social infl uencers to join the exclusive Cosmo Social Patrol. As a member, you could receive free products to try, get VIP access to cool events in your area, receive the inside scoop on discounts and special offers, and even appear in the pages of Cosmo! Email cosmosocialpatrol@hearst.com for more info!…

POP some Moët and sip every time host Jimmy Fallon breaks into song at the 74th Golden Globe Awards (Jan. 8, NBC). MEET Mackenzie, the aunt who’s so fun, she’s basically insane on The Mick (Jan. 1, Fox). CLEAR your Thursday night schedule. Scandal’s finally back on Jan. 19. #TGIT (ABC) LET the tears, roses, and rosé flow: Nick Viall moves into the mansion on The Bachelor (Jan. 2, ABC). PREPARE for nonstop streaming: Star, Fox’s musical drama about a rising girl group, debuts Dec. 14. MOVIES 1. HIDDEN FIGURES Taraji P. Henson, Janelle Monáe, and Octavia Spencer are boss as NASA’s “human computers” during the segregated ’60s (Jan. 6). 2. JACKIE Natalie Portman is getting major Oscar buzz (and serving serious style inspo) as Jackie Kennedy in the days…

Choice dessert: My favorite of Channing’s movies: a. Step Up b. Magic Mike c. 21 Jump Street d. Dear John The weirdest thing I’ve ever eaten: The last stamp in my passport is from: Ultimate dance movie (besides Step Up!): Go-to cocktail: If I could throw away one thing of Channing’s, it would be his: BRALET, SKIRT, Milly. EARRINGS, Fox & Bond. NECKLACE, Carbon & Hyde. RINGS (left pointer), Carbon & Hyde; (left ring finger) Jenna’s own. BRACELET, Jenna’s own Cartier…

“He took me to a fancy restaurant and told me not to order too much since we were going to a party at his parents’ after. By the time we got there, the food was gone and everyone had left. And when I said I needed to leave too, he refused to drive me home because he wanted to ‘save on fuel emissions.’” —HANNAH S., 19 “On our first date, he texted and told me to meet him at Chili’s at 7:30. I showed up and saw him sitting at a table with two other people. When I got to the table, he promptly introduced me...to his parents.” —SARAH E., 22 “While we were out on our very first date, he took my phone, made a video of himself saying,…

A THIN TWIST ON THE OREO YOU LOVE OREO Thins are thin, crisp, and delicate. Let’s throw in tasty. How about sleek and chic, too? Beautiful? Stunning. OREO Thins might be as fun to describe as they are to eat. oreo.com/thins SUPER CLEAN FOR 2017! Start the year off bright and white with ARM & HAMMER™ Plus OxiClean™ Liquid Detergent. It powers out your toughest stains while brightening, whitening, and freshening your laundry. armandhammer.com Get the Clean You Need! Purchase any ARM & HAMMERTM laundry detergent and receive a free linen bag when you share your receipt with Cosmopolitan. Arm & Hammer Lingerie Bag Gift With Purchase. Sponsored by Hearst Communications, Inc. Send your Arm & Hammer purchase receipts to Emma Tushman, Cosmopolitan Magazine, 300 W. 57th Street, 38th Floor,…

THE EQUIPMENT Nail every pic with a stabilizing selfie stick. THE BOOK Style star Aimee Song’s guide to Insta also looks fab as a photo prop. THE COAT Play into nostalgia with a patchcovered varsity jacket. THE SHOES Jazz up basics with silver boots that beg to be Boomeranged.…

STEP 1 PRIME YOUR SKIN The hottest Korean import: splash masks. Concentrated with exfoliating lactic acid and citrus extracts, they prep skin to better absorb the masks that follow. Stand over a sink, splash a capful onto clean skin, pat your wet hands onto your face for 15 seconds, then rinse. 1. BLITHE Patting Splash Mask in Yellow Citrus and Honey, $45, glowrecipe.com STEP 2 CHOOSE YOUR SKIN GOAL CLEAR COMPLEXION Loaded with skin-clarifying tea leaves, this powder turns into a paste when mixed with equal parts water. 2. ORIGINS RitualiTea Mind Over Maté Invigorating Powder Face Mask, $36, origins.com FLAWLESS TEXTURE Like the iconic Bliss Spa treatment, this gel infuses skin with oxygen and vitamins, bubbling as it deep-cleans. 3. BLISS Triple Oxygen Instant Energizing Foaming Mask, $56, blissworld.com STEP 3…

THE SUN AND YOUR CELL UV rays are intensified when reflected off your screen. Derms equate it to holding a mirror up to your face. Invest in an antiglare phone protector (you can find them on Amazon), and don’t forget the SPF. TECH EFFECT Uneven Texture  Blame it on high-energy visible (HEV) light—the blue light emitted by most smart devices. Science suggests that, like UV, it may cause brown spots and wrinkles, says Marnie Nussbaum, MD, an NYC derm. (Thankfully, HEV hasn’t been linked to skin cancer.) As a result, brands are tapping into ingredients designed to protect skin from HEV. Junetics’ SPF and Make’s primer use vegetable-derived melanin to absorb HEV before it penetrates skin, while Murad’s antioxidant cream strengthens skin as you snooze. A free hack for iPhone…

Vague resolutions like “lose weight” and “get a better body” never work. So be specific, and make 2017 the year of the rear with our gluteusmaximizing workout plan, the #CosmoButtChallenge. Because, let’s be honest, who doesn’t want more curves back there? Call it the Kardashian, Teyana Taylor, or Beyoncé effect: A full, perky backside is the ultimate symbol of strength and sex appeal. Five days a week, spend eight minutes doing this fivemove routine, designed by certified personal fitness trainer and Instagram star Angelica Gonzalez. The exercises get a smidge harder each week, but if it were super easy, everyone would have a wow-worthy bum! Get week one’s moves here, then visit Cosmopolitan.com/ButtChallenge to find workouts for weeks two, three, and four. HOW-TO Do 15 reps of each move in…

even if you know better (cancer! wrinkles!), sunbathing can be hard to quit. Whether in a tanning bed in January or on the beach in July, tanners aren’t hooked on just the look of bronzed skin but also the hit-meagain rush it elicits. “UV rays trigger the production of opioidlike endorphins,” says Bryon Adinoff, MD, professor of alcohol and drug abuse research at the University of Texas Southwestern Medical Center. Those neurochemicals can improve your mood and reduce stress and pain. “They have the same effect as morphine and heroin.” In one study, 74 percent of people who tan a few times a week exhibited an addictive-like relationship and some experienced jitters and nausea without rays. So save your skin now, sun junkies, in 12 easy steps. Step 1 Repeat…

GET PUMPED Blast your pregame playlist, and let the fashion show begin. MAKE MOVES BEFORE MIDNIGHT Dance your face off in fresh silhouettes and flashy prints. A major pantsuit brings as much sparkle as the champagne service. Beauty Tip Whether you go bold or neutral, a lip-softening formula will make your first make-out of 2017 something to remember. Hourglass Girl Lip Stylo, $32, fits the bill. HIT THE AFTERPARTY Ditch the bulky puffer for a statement coat worthy of the occasion. Bonus: Your Uber driver will spot you in a heartbeat. Beauty Tip Do your skin a solid and try an Erno Laszlo Hydra-Therapy Memory Sleep Mask, $90, before snoozing. Thanks to kelp and fruit extracts, you’ll wake up glowy—not puffy—post-partying. RELIVE THE NIGHT BEFORE LOL over last night’s Snaps…

1. SET REALISTIC EXPECTATIONS “When people say they want to be the next Ice Bucket Challenge, I cringe,” says Rachel Lazarus, an account manager at Classy. “It’s not that easy to go viral.” Instead of hoping the Today show discovers you, start with your circle 2. BE SPECIFIC “Raising money for something tangible is better than raising money for operational funds,” says Robert Wolfe, CEO of CrowdRise. Consider what is more inspiring: raising $50,000 for a hospital’s “operational costs” or raising $50,000 for a new hospital wing? 3. ASK FOR WHAT YOU REALLY NEED A lot of companies set a low goal amount just to have a successful campaign, reveals Grant Crider, a consultant at Startups.co. But if you raise $5,000 and you actually need $25,000, your company goes nowhere,…

1. What’s your go-to cocktail? a. Sangria b. Chardonnay c. Martini, extra dry 2. Your mostused emoji: a. b. c. 3. Dream vacay: a. Morocco b. Cape Cod c. Copenhagen 4. Fave store: a. Anthropologie b. Vineyard Vines c. Uniqlo 5. Which celeb are you BFFs with in your head? a. Solange Knowles b. Taylor Swift c. Kendall Jenner 6. Music that always gets you going: a. Florence and the Machine b. John Mayer c. Sia 7. Favorite snack: a. Spicy hummus b. Buttered popcorn c. Sashimi MOSTLY A’S Boho Beauty Your space deserves a free-spirited feel that matches your DGAF ’tude. Drape textiles over the sofa, pile on the patterns, and display objects you brought back from vacay. Who cares if the pillows don’t match perfectly? In your vibe-y…

CRAZY SITUATION WORKING YOUR LAST NERVE? VENT HERE! FLIPPING OUT “The server had the nerve to put these deconstructed pancakes in front of me and say, ‘This is how I like them at home.’” —ANGELA M. BENCH WARMER “Spreading out on a crowded train when other people need a seat. Unbelievable.” —KYRAC. AUTO INCORRECT “While rearranging things in the back of his car, this guy allowed his daughters to play on top of it. Seems legit.” —MELISSA M. “Like, we get it, you went to a concert. No need to Snapchat the whole thing with super shitty sound from seats 100 mi les away. #PetPeeve” —SHAY D., @SHAYDAVIAU “Today some diva walked into yoga class 15 min late and put her mat literally on top of my mat whi le…

The cutie barista at Starbucks gives you a wink. You: a. Assume some froth flew into his eye and it’s irritated. b. Ask him what his fave order is and then gauge the situation. c. Slip him my number while I slowly lick whipped cream off the rim of my cup. It’s your BFF’s office party, and you’re unsure of the dress code. What do you wear? a. A conservative pantsuit and penny loafers. I don’t want to embarrass my girl by overdressing. b. A cocktail dress with a blazer. I can always take it off when people go Gangnam Style. c. A sequined gown with a Yoncé ponytail. My go-to party trick: Swing it around like a helicopter. Sick day! But really, you just have personal stuff to take…