Innehållsförteckning för Special #3 2023 från O, Quarterly

One of my favorite Bible verses is “Be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind.” I love that. When you stay open—no matter what—letting each experience, even the tough ones, strengthen you and add depth and wisdom, you’ll be awakened to greater heights. The stories of transformation in this issue are all about finding one’s way to that more expansive life: Designer JJ Martin shares one big shift, while other women reveal small but surprisingly meaningful changes, and Chip Conley invites us into a community he’s built—the Modern Elder Academy—to nurture what he calls the “midlife chrysalis.” We’ve also included three exercises to help ignite your own evolution. Plus, a multi-page package on the change all women will go through (what Maria Shriver and I call the Big M—menopause).…

1 Jean Smart A denim shirt is the traditional white shirt’s cooler, more easy going cousin. This Western style isn’t just great with jeans (we do love a denim tuxedo). It can also bring snazzy casualness to both a traditional black pencil skirt for day and a jazzier sparkly one for evening. $80; levi.com 2 In the Pocket Cargos are back in a big way. This bordeaux pair perfectly melds dressy and sportif into something that can stylishly sub for your goto trousers with a silk blouse and blazer or a chunky knit sweater. $495; vince.com 3 Carried Away Meet your new favorite tote. Its buttery, light-weight leather and effortless, unstructured shape make it great as a handbag or work carryall. And carry all it does—there’s plenty of room…

Skin-Matching Sunscreen True Botanicals Everyday Skin Tint SPF 30 Get the daily broad-spectrum protection you need (thanks to zinc oxide), plus glow-giving hydration (from milk thistle and squalane) and a complexion-matching tint (there are 18 wide-ranging shades). ($54; truebotanicals.com) Two-in-One Cleanser Vintner’s Daughter Active Renewal Cleanser This minimalist brand’s third product combines oil and water-based plant extracts to create a potent face wash that treats and double cleanses in one step. ($98; vintnersdaughter.com) Wrinkle Serum No7 Future Renew Damage Reversal Serum To bring collagen-boosting to all, the brains at No7 pin-pointed the two most stable and powerful peptides our skin makes when it’s in repair mode and then recreated them in this serum to help skin look firmer and smoother. ($40; walgreens.com) Hydrating Serum for Darker Skin Tones…

Smoothing Treatment U Beauty Resurfacing Body Compound For newborn skin without the scrubbing, this daily leave-on lotion delivers top-notch ingredients (alpha hydroxy acids, antioxidants, marine ferments) exactly where they’re needed to treat rough patches, razor bumps, uneven tone, and keratosis pilaris. ($128; ubeauty.com) Lifting Neck Cream Dr. Brandt Needles No More Neck Tightening Cream One of the hardest-to-improve areas is the skin on the neck. And while no cream can replace injectables or surgery, this peptide-and-polysaccharide technology makes noticeable de-sagging headway. ($90; drbrandtskincare.com) No-Fail Antiperspirant Degree Unlimited Clean Antiperspirant Deodorant Dry Spray This clear formula keeps underarms dry through workouts, stressful presentations, and more—discreet pit checks not needed. ($12; drugstores) Gentlest Exfoliant Tatcha Hinoki Body Wash Eco-friendly cellulose particles soften skin, while the transporting scent (a blend of calming cedar…

Daisy Jones & the Six BY TAYLOR JENKINS REID If you haven’t already devoured the Amazon Prime limited series based on Reid’s novel, and even if you have, the audio production is a perfect vehicle for this rock’n’ roll soap opera. An all-star cast fills out the band and their entourage; particularly lovable are Judy Greer as keyboardist Karen and Benjamin Bratt as Billy’s younger brother, Graham. Heartburn BY NORA EPHRON Heartburn is one of the funniest, sharpest novels of our time, and Meryl Streep’s hilarious and endearing reading makes it clear that Ephron will never, ever be dated. In fact, she predicted emojis in the first few pages! (“I am not the sort of person who puts little faces on things, but there are times when nothing else will…

For two years, I didn’t sleep well. Never a full night. No peace. Restlessness and heart palpitations were my steady companions at nightfall. This was back when I was 48 to 50. I went to see a cardiologist. Took medication. Wore a heart monitor for weeks. And then one day, walking through the offices of The Oprah Winfrey Show, I picked up a copy of The Wisdom of Menopause, Dr. Christiane Northrup’s book, and the pages fell open to the heading “Palpitations: Your Heart’s Wake-Up Call.” I took it as a sign. Contained in that book was the answer I’d been going from doctor to doctor trying to figure out. Heart palpitations and sleeplessness were indications that The Change was coming. But no one, including my trusted doctors, had warned…

1 You can’t really test for it There are several at-home blood tests sold online claiming to analyze your hormone balance and tell you how close to menopause you are. They typically monitor levels of estrogen, luteinizing hormone, and follicle-stimulating hormone, all important for ovulation. But one blood test won’t account for the unpredictable rise and fall of hormones during your transition. Perimenopause is generally diagnosed clinically, meaning that a doctor will factor in your age, medical history, family history, and symptoms. 2 Genes and race can impact the timing, duration, and severity of symptoms Recent studies have shown that genetics and family history play a major role in determining the age you reach menopause. “If everybody in your family went through it early, chances are you might as well,” says Suzanne…

“Sex is stress-free, and you feel good in your own skin. You get to have sex and not worry about getting pregnant! And, yes, you can maintain an active and healthy sex life. Your body does change. You realize that it’s really not so much about how the body looks but how it functions. If it’s functioning well but there’s a little bit of extra padding, who cares?” —Carolyn, 57, attorney, Sandy Hook, Connecticut…

Fall Finds A perfect mix of the unexpected and the practical to help you kick off the season. A High Note Send your kiddo off to school with confidence-boosting vibes. Tuck in one of these cards that care with lunch (great for grown-ups, too), and they’ll have a bite-size afternoon pick-me-up of positivity. Color Box Design & Letterpress Lunch Box Notes, originally $24 for 15, now 20 percent off with code OPRAH; colorboxletterpress.com. Bright Now Meet the Goldilocks of puffers. It’s just the right thickness to get through the seasonal shift in style, thanks to the fun color selection. Plus, it’s sustainably made without feathers. Kyla hooded jacket, originally $188 each, now 20 percent off with code OPRAH; savetheduck.com. Show of Hands Even post-grad, signet rings are always a great…

Vibrant Blush Make Beauty Skin Mimetic Microsuede Blush This is not your average powder tint. Formulated with hyaluronic acid, this super-pigmented option feels silky on skin. ($28; makebeauty.com) For more exclusive 2023 Beauty O-wards content, head to oprahdaily.com/beautyawards2023.…

Volumizing Hairspray Better Not Younger Wake Up Call High Hold Thickening Hairspray Fluctuating hormones cause strands to thin and hair to become less dense. This biotin infused brushable spray makes your style look bulkier as it tames. ($35; betternotyounger.com) Double-Duty Cleanser Womaness Clean Slate Creamy & Gentle Facial Cleanser As the body’s natural oil production drops and cell turnover slows, skin can get drier and duller. This cleanser tackles both issues with lactic acid (the most hydrating AHA), aloe, chamomile, and hyaluronic acid. ($22; womaness.com) Age Spot Serum Vichy Laboratories Neovadiol Meno 5 Bi-Serum To improve dark spots and larger areas of unevenness that pop up during menopause, apply this formula with vitamin C, omega-6, and omega-9 after cleansing. ($39; vichyusa.com) Dry Hair Mask Stripes The Crown Pleaser Ectoine Densifying…

Edible Art When life gives you a boatload of zucchini, slice them up for this stunning platter. It’s a super-elegant side, yet there’s barely anything to cook—just the dukkah, a blend of seeds and spices that you toast in a pan for flavor and crunch. Zucchini Carpaccio INGREDIENTS 3 medium yellow and/or green zucchini, about8 ounces each1 Tbsp. lemon juice2 Tbsp. extra-virgin olive oil Kosher salt and freshly ground pepper1 ear fresh corn, kernels cut from the cob¼ cup chopped mint¼ cup chopped dill2 to 3 zucchini blossoms, stamens removed (optional) FOR THE SEEDY DUKKAH 1 Tbsp. olive oil½ cup raw pepitas¼ cup sunflower seeds1 Tbsp. cumin seeds2 Tbsp. sesame seeds¾ tsp. flaky sea salt such as Maldon Aleppo-style pepper or freshly ground pepper 1. Slice the zucchini as thinly…

It’s impossible to be in midlife and not wonder how you got there. It’s a question that inevitably comes with thinning hair and wrinkles that reveal passing time like tree rings. If you’re curious and bold, you will eventually ask the more important question: Where is my life headed, and how will I find joy, purpose, and meaning in the next chapter of life? The truth is, I’m 62 and still trying to figure it out. Right now, I am dipping my toes and surfboard into the warm Pacific Ocean as I spy a whale thrusting its way out of the water. I am at home in Baja, Mexico, which happens to be the home of the Modern Elder Academy (MEA), which I cofounded five years ago as the world’s…

From what I remember, most of my parents’ fights were about money, and about the fact that neither of them felt like they were in the marriage they wanted to be in, or more precisely, that they were married to the person they wanted to be married to. They argued about my dad’s spending versus my mother’s thriftiness; my dad’s failures to earn versus my mother’s failure of ambition; my dad’s regular absences versus my mother’s obsession with me. They both harbored deep disappointment over what their lives had become—my mother was disappointed in my dad, and my dad was disappointed in the marriage. I had the sense that I was the only thing keeping them together, or that I had to try to be. I was supposed to deliver…

I knew a woman whose family fled the Soviet Union in 1985, when she was 7. At the train station just before the border, her mother was taken into custody by Soviet guards. In the 24 hours they held her mother, a circle of hair from the child’s scalp simply fell out. Her mother was released, they made it to Italy, and by the time they had settled in Baltimore, her hair had grown back. The story always stayed with me. What the fear of losing her mother will do to the child’s body in a matter of hours. In my case, it was the inverse. I was in my early 40s when, out of the blue, we had a very sick child. I didn’t lose my hair all at…

MORE THAN A BILLION PEOPLE WORLDWIDE will be in menopause by 2025. Every day in the United States, an estimated 6,000 Gen Xers—like the two of us—are entering menopause. We’re both proud to be part of the generation breaking the silence and smashing the stigma that has long shrouded this transition. Leading women like Oprah Winfrey, Michelle Obama, and Tracee Ellis Ross have gone public with their experiences. By all accounts, the menopause market is booming, from emerging telehealth enterprises to wellness empires. More and more employers are implementing menopause-friendly work policies, a topic now regularly covered in journals like Harvard Business Review. Even Congress has gotten the memo; last fall the bipartisan Menopause Research Act of 2022 was introduced in the House, a bill that would require an evaluation…

If I were a middle-aged man suffering from erectile dysfunction, I could walk into my neighborhood pharmacy and buy a 30-day supply of sildenafil (the generic for Viagra) for $8.67 out of pocket, and, no, that’s not the insurance copay. That’s the basic cash cost, with a coupon. A menopausal woman in search of affordable estrogen, however—a requirement not just for her sexual health but for her overall health and well-being—has to deal with a lot more. To give you an idea of what monthly systemic estrogen and local vaginal estrogen costs look like on a personal level—because each woman’s needs and symptoms can vary as widely as her insurance coverage, her medical history, and the costs of medications where she lives—allow me to present my own monthly costs as…

She’s just jealous of you.” As children, we’re often fed this line whenever we complain of mistreatment by another child, usually a girl. It’s not you, it’s her: “She can’t control that green-eyed monster within her that wants to bring you down.” I don’t remember thinking about the truth of this excuse much when I was young; I was happy to take this leap of logic. That girl who mocked me on the playground probably was jealous of me! While this assessment was never interrogated for accuracy, it did provide an easy emotional Band-Aid. In our culture, we conflate jealousy and envy, even though there’s a critical difference between the two words: Jealousy is not between two people. It requires a third. This might show up as someone in pursuit…

1 Find Your Passion The first part of figuring out how you want to spend your one and only life: identifying the activities that make you light up. In the column to the right, complete each sentence with a different answer. You may find that they range widely (from, say, apple picking to line dancing to meditating), which is fine. Try not to censor yourself or respond in ways you think you “should.” Be as honest as possible. A. Now whittle it down. Ask yourself, If I had to choose between the first activity and the second, which is more appealing to me? If you get stuck, close your eyes and envision a life in which the first activity plays a major role and the second doesn’t exist. Now envision a life…

Hydrating Liquid Lipstick Fenty Beauty Fenty Icon Velvet Liquid Lipstick Hold up: This matte tint is nothing like what we’ve come to expect of bold but drying liquids. It’s rich, smooth, and so soft. ($29; fentybeauty.com) Nourishing Foundation 1. Haus Labs by Lady Gaga Triclone Skin Tech Medium Coverage Foundation Everyone should have the option to try this weightless, longwear tint—and with 51 (!) shades, they can. The formula contains over 20 skincare ingredients to treat as you wear it. ($45; hauslabs.com) Easiest Highlighter 2. Iconic London Rollaway Glow Glide this rollerball applicator across cheek bones, then blend the liquid with your fingers; the gleam it gives is happy magic. ($29; us.iconiclondoninc.com) Lengthening Mascara 3. Maybelline New York The Falsies Surreal Extensions Mascara A large wand manages to find and…

Hair-Growth Serum Iles Formula Scalp + Hair Rejuvenating Booster For an effortless way to rev growth, spritz this wasabi and peptide-biotin complex onto a wet or dry scalp; it dries with zero residue as it strengthens strands and activates circulation. ($95; ilesformula.com) Weightless Damage Treatment Kerasilk Liquid Cuticle Filler Vegan silk technology in this lightweight mist replenishes the amino acids damaged hair needs to restore strength. Spray onto towel-dried hair, then blow-dry. ($34; amazon.com) Quick-Working Mask Hours In Minutes Silkening Mask Most hair masks suggest leaving the formula on hair for at least 10 minutes, but this avocado-andbiotin-based option works in two minutes. We’ve given it even less time and still experienced much softer, shinier strands. ($36; hourshaircare.com) Potent Dry Shampoo Batiste Overnight Deep Cleanse Dry Shampoo Bedtime is the…

Let Us Descend BY JESMYN WARD The two-time National Book Award–winning author of Salvage the Bones and Sing, Unburied, Sing delivers her most masterful work yet. Born into slavery and out of sexual assault, Annis has lived a life characterized by bodily exploitation. When she is sold south, her power over her physical reality only shrinks. But this is not the only reality that matters; Annis’s mother always told her that this world was “seething with spirit.” She was right. Pitting ancestral wisdom and human connection against the arbitrary brutality of slavery, this book will have readers torn between wanting to savor the richness of every sentence and needing to know, immediately, what happens next. Land of Milk and Honey BY C PAM ZHANG The menu takes a turn for…

Despite the many condolences I received on my 40th birthday, I felt elated. I thought I had all the gifts I needed to take on my next decade. Two years later, family and work were still humming along fine, but my body was in full freak-out, for reasons I couldn’t fathom. Unbeknownst to me, I had entered the hormonal hurricane of perimenopause. The symptoms made every facet of my life more difficult for more than a decade, and here’s the infuriating part: Every moment of suffering was unnecessary. If someone had handed me a blunt rundown of menopause basics on that big birthday, I would have gone in prepared, gotten the help I needed, and sailed toward 50 healthier, and more hopeful. But no one did. So this is it:…

BIs for BRAIN FOG new. One bright note: For many women, in the first year or two of postmenopause, the fog lifts. This is one of the earliest signs. It’s often dismissed by doctors (“It’s probably stress,” they say), but you know it’s way too real as you start losing words and forgetting the obvious, and suddenly a simple instruction sheet looks like string theory because the information is not getting into your head. We’re used to our bodies going UFO on us, but having our minds abducted by some alien force? “There are some women whose brains are exquisitely sensitive to changes in estrogen in terms of their cognitive function,” says Pauline Maki, PhD, a professor of psychiatry, psychology, and obstetrics and gynecology at the University of Illinois at Chicago.…

TWO TO FOUR YEARS The amount of time longer than white women that Black and Latina women experience perimenopause symptoms. 20% THE NUMBER OF OB-GYN RESIDENCY PROGRAMS THAT PROVIDE ANY KIND OF MENOPAUSE TRAINING. Women who report having hot flashes, commonly called vasomotor symptoms, or VMS. up to eighty percent How big the global menopause market has grown to. Almost $17 Billion 8.5 On average, Black women reach menopause 8.5 months earlier than white women and have worse symptoms, such as hot flashes, depression, and sleep disturbances, but are less likely to receive hormone therapy as well as medical and mental health services. Fatigue A global survey found this symptom to be women’s number 1 complaint. The number of medical residents who admit that they feel barely comfortable discussing or…

MY editor called me, sounding like most of my employees that week, speaking in a wobbly voice. She was scraping the bottom of an empty content barrel, she said, and our inventory of smiling, cavorting models and brightly patterned party-table settings were out of sync with the darkened, solemn veil that had blanketed the world. So, what I did next startled us both. With no makeup or good lighting, and without a shred of a script, I climbed up onto my couch, hung a colorful La DoubleJ print on the wall behind my head, stared into my empty phone, and hit “Live.” It was late March 2020, and I’d been sitting in an empty apartment in Milan watching the world spin and burn around a giant firepit of coronavirus fear. I…

“She has such a pretty face; if only she would lose weight,” I overheard a relative say when I was 12. “You’re pretty—you’re just physically not my type,” a high school crush said, stopping short of saying he was into girls who wore a size 4, not a 14. When you live in a larger body, the go-to compliment about your looks almost always involves a version of “You have such a pretty face.” The unsaid part: You’re too fat to really be attractive. And while these double-edged compliments torpedoed my body confidence, they made me feel great about my face. My near-perfect skin felt like a worthy consolation prize for the thick thighs and belly rolls. While all my high school friends were worshiping at the altar of Noxzema, I…