Innehållsförteckning för Spring 2020 från Psychologies

Kia Cannons Creative coach and happiness expert Host of the popular Happy Hacks podcast and founder of Untold Happiness, a group coaching community for creative people, Kia teaches you how to do what you love. Launching this month, every week she will post a five-minute video tip about happiness on Psychologies’ free Life Labs website (lifelabs.psychologies.co.uk). This month, Kia’s Happy Hacks column also begins in The Fix on page 15. Becca Forshaw Life and career coach Becca trained with Barefoot Coaching as a life and career coach. She has an extensive background in sales across a range of sectors, including The Sunday Times ‘100 best companies to work for’ list. Becca also contributes online blogs and tips to the Psychologies Life Labs website and, last year, she created an online…

My dad, When Mum left you, she also left me and my brother. At the time, you were only in your 20s, you enjoyed nights out and had no fixed job. The responsibility was huge – to care for two young children on your own. But you did it. And although you admit that you made mistakes in the first few years, later, you more than made up for them. You have always been there for me, making me feel safe, and to this day you can reassure me in seconds. You have such a wonderful outlook on life. You’re a fantastic, doting grandad, loved dearly by all of your grandchildren. You taught me so much. Your energy and zest for life is both inspiring and infectious to all in…

DID YOU WATCH the recent Our Planet documentary series on Netflix? Winner of the Emmy for outstanding narration by David Attenborough, it showed the power film can have in bringing the climate crisis into our homes and hearts. A survey found that 67 per cent of viewers say the series made them realise the urgency of environmental issues. Our Planet Live In Concert reimagines the series on stage – an immersive experience combining stunning visuals with innovative live production effects, including a 66-piece orchestra. Venues are encouraged to work as sustainably as possible, all net profits will be donated to the World Wide Fund for Nature’s education and awareness initiatives and a ticket levy will support the WWF’s A Trillion Trees reforestation programme. Book at ticketmaster.co.uk ‘Psychologies’ is proudly championing…

• One in 10 unwanted gifts go straight to landfill – what a waste on all fronts! • One in five people plan to purchase an experience-based gift for a loved this year. • ¼ of the total weight of Easter eggs is made up of plastic and paper wrapping. • 30% more rubbish is created during the gift-giving festive period. • 37% of people say they would be happy to receive a charitable donation as a present. • In UK, we buy more cards per person than any other nation – 33 each every year.*…

Q After years of training, I have qualified as a lawyer. I enjoy the work and I am good at it, but I struggle with all the ‘peripheral’ bits. For example, I am expected to bring in new clients, which means networking, and I feel that I’m not very good at it. Also, here in the office, I am not great at getting ‘in’ with the partners, and I feel angry and resentful when I see others who are not as capable professionally working their way into the inner circle. Are all jobs like this – where your skill at the job matters less than your social skills? How can I do both? Name supplied A The short answer is that both your technical ability and getting on with other…

●The UKCP Alongside professional support for our members, we are the leading research, innovation, educational and regulatory body working to advance psychotherapies for the benefit of all. Our membership includes more than 8,000 therapists and 70 training and accrediting organisations. Members work privately, in public health or third-sector organisations, offering a range of approaches for couples, individuals, families and groups • To find the right therapist, log on to psychologies.co.uk/ find-a-therapist and look at our Life Labs Channel of experts who may be able to help, or visit psychotherapy.org.uk/find-a-therapist to locate a therapist near you.…

The ‘Psychologies’- endorsed ‘Find a coach’ directory, with Barefoot  Coaching, provides a choice of top coaches, all with postgraduate training accredited by the University of Chester and the International Coach Federation. Find a coach who suits you to help you navigate and transform your life – in the areas of money, work, relationships, parenting, health and leadership. Editor-in-Chief ASK THE EXPERT… a helps person behind the job title develop the clarity, skills and mental strength to create work-related change. Q I only work to live. I am in my mid 30s and my friends feel the same. We were sold the dream of a big career and pursued it, but whether we’re just exhausted or feel we’ve done everything we came to do, we’re ready to start ‘living’ life rather…

• GPs are not required to have mandatory training on the menopause. It is, however, still always worth making an appointment to see your GP as a first port of call. There may also be a clinical nurse specialist at your surgery who could provide a compassionate ear and point you in the right direction or prescribe suitable treatment. Other resources to try: • The British Menopause Society is the place to find a local menopause specialist who deals in post-reproductive health; thebms.org.uk • For more from menopause specialist Louise Newson and details about her Menopause & Wellbeing Centre, see menopausedoctor.co.uk • Menopause clinics offer a holistic range of services, including nutritionists, wellness coaches and hormone specialists. It might also be worth looking into mental health treatments such as CBT…

1 EAT WELL Hormones need nutrients, and I focus on that rather than calories – unprocessed, natural food so your hormones have all that they need to work properly. Eat organic meat and eggs, line-caught or wild fish, especially oily, full-fat organic dairy, plenty of vegetables of all colours, fruit, wholegrains, nuts and seeds, pulses, legumes and healthy fats and oils – cold-pressed coconut oil, olive oil or grass-fed butter for cooking and plant and seed oils for dressings. 2 REST Cortisol – the stress hormone – can have a huge impact on us overall. When our body is in survival mode during the stress response, aka the fight-or-flight state, it has a knock-on effect on the body’s other hormonal production. In times of stress, our resources go towards surviving…

EACH ISSUE, we’ll give you a series of questions to discuss with your Life Leap Club. Pose the question and listen to the answers, without interrupting. Subscribe to Psychologies now to take our course, ‘Magnificent menopause’. Ponder these: 1 How have you dealt with transition in the past? Whether it was a house move or having a baby, getting married, divorced, or going to university, what did you find most challenging and how did you deal with it? 2 How do you know when you’re feeling ‘off ’ physically or mentally? How does it usually show up? For example, do you find yourself drinking too much coffee because you’re tired, or do you feel low for long periods of time? If you were to do something differently to…

This month, our Real Eco panel of readers has been putting sustainable yoga mats and candles through their paces. Compassion is central to yoga, but many mats aren’t made from materials that are kind to your body or the planet. When you next need a new mat, try one of these award winners, which all use upcycled, natural or biodegradable materials. And to help you get into the flow, these candles are vegan-friendly and sustainable. Join the conversation and let me know which products you trust with #PsychologiesRealEco on social media, plus read more reviews at psychologies.co.uk/real-eco. Enjoy!…

April is Stress Awareness Month – but is it enough to simply be aware that we’re stressed? I think awareness helps, but the key lies in paying attention to the sensations that stress creates, physically and mentally, so we can begin to truly know our stress. Paying attention to our symptoms can help us understand our stress triggers and allow us to have compassion for ourselves and our situation. In turn, we begin to see more clearly what we can change, and try to accept what we cannot. So, let’s start thinking about how we can get to know, and even befriend, our stress.…

MY FAVOURITE snack that always hits the spot is a juicy apple or pear, cut in half, pips scooped out and the void filled with crunchy peanut butter. Or try slicing and filling dates with nut butter for a sweet treat that packs a fibre and protein punch. If you really want your snack to have a nutritional impact, Whole Earth Dark Roasted Peanut Butter is made with healthy hi-oleic peanuts. Ali…

THE ANALOGY OF a garden epitomises our gut on many levels. Consider too many potentially ‘bad’ microbes in the gut, food and lifestyle triggers as the weeds, the terrain of the gut as the soil, gut-supportive foods and nutrients as fertilisers and beneficial microbes as seeds. Would you plant seeds in a garden full of weeds with depleted soil? Think about caring for your gut in the same way. Springtime is when the weather turns a bit warmer, leaves start to appear on trees and flowers begin to bloom, so it might also be a good time for gut horticulture. The first important thing to note is that each and every one of your gardens will need different tending and will have its own specific weeds. Moreover, if you have…

WITH BRITISH podcast world awash with southern accents, I love the gentle, flatter vowels of Rangan Chatterjee, as he interviews health experts who remind you that walking is simply brilliant for everything (Shane O’Mara episode), or questions what you know about depression and how to treat it with Johann Hari. A recent highlight is listening to the chatty doc reconnecting with former patient Nicola Singleton, who was on his BBC One show Doctor In The House in 2016. At the time, Nicola had 10 different health diagnoses and was taking 20 different pills a day. In the intervening years, she has put much of Chatterjee’s advice into practice and is now transformed. Her message is powerful because of her personal and low-key delivery, and inspiring enthusiasm for making changes and…

• Nightly rates at the Dharana-Shillim estate start from £350 for a single occupancy spa villa; shillim.in • Alongside bespoke retreats, there is a cookery school and excursions to the Karla caves, a Buddhist temple and the Hindu temple of Ekvira can be arranged. • The drive from Mumbai takes three hours and it is advisable to book a car. For details, see shillim.in • Flights from UK airports to Mumbai start from around £450 with British Airways; ba.com…

Vale de Moses, high in the Serra da Estrela, is one of the top five yoga retreats in Europe. Retreat at any time of the year for inspirational yoga, suitable for all, healing massages and nourishing, plant-based food. Enjoy your practice in a beautiful glass shala with incredible views; explore pine forests; wild swim and mud bathe in rivers and immerse yourself in nature. Our winner will glamp in the heart of the forest. To enter, go to tinyurl.com/ winportugal. Closing date is 11 May 2020. There is no cash alternative to the prize. Prices from £812 pp per week. If you don’t want to wait to hear if you’ve been lucky enough to win, all readers have a 5% discount if you quote ‘Psychologies2020’ when reserving your place online.valedemoses.com;…

Making a happier home is not about expensive refurbishment, it’s about considering your ‘why’. What’s your goal? What are your core values and what changes do you want to make that will serve your life? For example, is it an expensive new kitchen that will bring you more joy, or creating a space that allows you to sit down as a family at mealtimes and talk? Seeing your home with new eyes will allow you to get creative, highlight special pieces and make the most of what you have. Start here and the rest will follow……

What could be better than some fresh crusty bread dipped into a bowlful of nourishing soup as we – finally – celebrate the joys of spring? Whether served hot, or chilled as an al fresco accompaniment, it’s such a versatile dish; plus, it’s wholesome and a great way to get your five-a-day health fix. From light vegetable broths to creamy and luxurious medleys, there’s a soup for every season – a feast in a bowl that can be enjoyed as a snack, starter or main meal, even better still, in the sunshine! Belinda Williams, founder of soup company Yorkshire Provender, brings us a collection of delicious assortments for every occasion in her new book, Delicious Soups (Ryland, Peters & Small, £16.99). So, fire up the stove for a sweet and…

“Being satisfied with what we have is a magical golden key to being alive in a full, unrestricted, and inspired way“ Pema Chödrön is our favourite wise woman. Beloved Buddhist teacher, author, nun and mother, she has inspired millions of people around the world who have been touched by her example and message of practising peace in these turbulent times. The Pema Chödrön Foundation is dedicated to preserving and sharing Pema’s inspiration and teachings in order that they might help us all awaken wisdom and compassion in ourselves and the world around us. pemachodronfoundation.org To buy her books, go to shambhala.com; bookdepository.com; betterworldbooks.com…

PSYCHOLOGIES FRANCE Editor-in-Chief: Laurence Folléa PSYCHOLOGIES ROMANIA Ringier Magazines, 6 Dimitri Pompeiu Street, Bucharest. Tel: +40 212 03 08 00. Managing Director: Mihnea Vasiliu (mihnea.vasiliu@ringier.ro) Editor-in-Chief: Iuliana Alexa (iuliana. alexa@ringier.ro ) Advertising Manager: Monica Pop (monica.pop@ringier.ro) PSYCHOLOGIES BELGIUM Edition Ventures, Chaussée de Louvain 431D, 1830 Lasne. Tel: + 32 2 379 29 90 Editorial Director: Marie-Christine De Wasseige (mc.dewasseige@ventures. be ) Chief editor (French): Christiane Thiry (christiane.thiry@ventures.be) Chief editor (Flemish): Barbara Van den Abeele (b.vandenabeele@ventures.be) Advertising Manager: Manoëlle Sepulchre (manoelle.sepulchre@ventures.be) PSYCHOLOGIES RUSSIA Hearst Shkulev Media, Psychologies Russia, 31 b Shabolovkaya Street, Moscow 115162. Tel: +7 495 981 39 10 President: Viktor Shkulev (vshkulev@hsmedia.ru) Editor-in-Chief: Xsenia Kiseleva (xkiseleva@hsmedia.ru) Publisher and Advertising Manager: Ekatarina Kerova (ekerova@hsmedia.ru)…

@BarefootCoaches: We had a great day yesterday at Barefoot HQ with our friends from @PsychologiesMag, talking about our wonderful exclusive partnership and some exciting opportunities for the year to come! @divinechocolate: Have you seen us featured in @PsychologiesMag? Thank you so much @Ellen_Tout for the shout-out – #PsychologiesRealEco #bcorp @Nattehughes: I feel like this always lands in my lap at just the right time… when I’ve been wanting guidance on something, it’s as though I subconsciously order it in @PsychologiesMag @lucytulloch coaching: When I was approached to write in Psychologies’coaching pages, I thought they’d made a mistake! I’ve had a fear of writing since school and I’m plagued with impostor syndrome. But when we do the stuff we find hard, we achieve great things. Bit of a fangirl of @claudiawinkle…

I am hosting a weekly Do What You Love video series on Life Labs, Psychologies’ fantastic blogging website. In each bite-size lesson, I’ll guide you through insightful exercises, from activities that bring you into a state of flow to ways to uncover your ‘zone of genius’. This month’s happy hack is to ask: ‘Who is living my ideal life and why?’ Grab your journal, write down your answer and join us on Life Labs to take this work deeper. Join Kia Cannons on ‘Psychologies’ Life Labs to take this month’s happy hack to the next level. Life Labs is a blogging platform where world-class experts write about everything from productivity and work-life balance to improving communication in relationships; lifelabs.psychologies.co.uk; happyhacks.libsyn.com…

1 The Lion, The Witch And The Wardrobe CS Lewis ‘I was six when I read this and it took me from a difficult home life to an incredible universe of the imagination – a place I still go to with the help of books.’ 2 The Virgin And The Gypsy DH Lawrence ‘One of the few opportunities to explore sexuality growing up in Ireland in the 1970s.’ 3 The House Of The Spirits Isabel Allende ‘When I came to London as a teenager, I stopped reading but, when I was 18 or 19, I rediscovered books and this gave me the same sense of excitement and escapism as The Lion, The Witch And The Wardrobe.’ 4 Cloudstreet Tim Winton ‘This writer…

1 ‘On my last birthday, my children and I went for a walk in the countryside instead of an expensive meal in a restaurant. We spent several hours laughing in the fresh air, and it was so much more memorable.’ Vee Sey 2 ‘Instead of sending a birthday present to my mother-in-law, we bought theatre tickets, she came to stay for a weekend and we all went together. We live four hours apart so don’t see her as much as we would like, and this was an anchor for some lovely time together.’ Elizabeth Heathcote 3 ‘I offered to babysit for my friend, so that she could go on a date with her husband, giving them some well-deserved time out from parenting.’ Leona Gerrard 4 ‘I took my husband to…

Sitting on the floor, I am holding Oscar, my little black spaniel, and he is licking away my tears… Over the years, I’ve become an expert at avoiding my negative feelings – distracting myself with box sets, getting too involved in other people’s dramas, losing hours of my life surfing mindlessly on my phone and numbing myself with wine or work. On my slow journey, however, I’ve learned that if I am constantly running away from the fear of feeling bad, sad or mad, I also miss out on feeling glad. Trying to run away from my feelings means I run away from the present moment and create a life of exhaustion and brittleness – looking at my life from the outside in, as if I’m at a window, an…

Modern family life can feel like a pressure cooker ready to explode. Work-life imbalances, caring responsibilities and teenage tantrums can make family and leisure time as stressful as our day jobs – and may have a serious impact on our emotional and mental states. Family therapy – or to give it its full title, family and systemic psychotherapy – helps people in close relationships help each other. It enables family members, couples and those who care about each other to express and explore difficult thoughts and emotions safely, understand each other’s experiences and views, appreciate each other’s needs, build on strengths and make useful changes in their relationships and lives. We need to talk about this! Individuals can also find family therapy beneficial as an opportunity to reflect on important…

Psychologies’ partnership with Barefoot Coaching  gives you the tools to find a coach who meets your needs. Barefoot Coaching has been at the forefront of coaching and coach training for 25 years. It has a proven track record as a provider of high-level coaching and coach training to organisations and senior executives, nationally and internationally Train as a coach with Barefoot Coaching The Barefoot Coaching International Coach Federation- accredited Postgraduate Certificate in Business and Personal Coaching is one of the most well-established coach training courses in the UK. Barefoot runs regular, free introductions to coach training throughout the year. Visit barefootcoaching. co.uk/taster-mornings to book…

Menopause marks the end of your periods and fertility. The NHS states: ‘The menopause is a natural part of ageing that usually occurs between 45 and 55 years of age, as a woman’s oestrogen levels decline.’ Nicki Williams award-winning nutritionist, author, women’s health expert and founder of the Happy Hormones For Life programme explains: ‘Menopause is the stage that we enter one year after our periods fully stop.’ The average age for a woman to reach the menopause is 51, according to the NHS. That isn’t to say, however, that this is when symptoms begin. The initial stage, perimenopause, which is when our hormones begin to fluctuate, can start a decade before that. Louise Newson, a GP and menopause specialist, describes perimenopause as ‘when hormone levels start reducing and a…

• The benefits: HRT helps relieve most menopausal symptoms: hot flushes, night sweats, mood swings, vaginal dryness and reduced sex drive. HRT is also known to reduce the risk of cardiovascular disease and osteoporosis, which naturally increase as a result of declining hormones in the body. • The risks: There is an increased risk of breast cancer while using HRT, but menopause specialist Louise Newson clarifies: ‘The risk of breast cancer while on HRT is very small; it is of a similar magnitude to drinking one or two glasses of wine a night or being overweight. Those taking oestrogen alone and those under 51 years of age do not have an increased risk of breast cancer, and any risks of taking HRT are reversed when the treatment is stopped.’…

THE FIRST TIME I noticed a change was on my 52nd birthday. I’d been noting my menstrual cycle, basal body temperature (BBT), sleep, mood and energy levels. My period was late and my BBT wasn’t where I expected it to be. I knew I wasn’t pregnant and realised that my hormones were changing so I was perimenopausal. I felt well equipped for hormonal change and menopause. I knew what to expect so I was prepared. I’d suffered with chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS) for five years and helped my body using nutrition, targeted supplements, meditation, movement and spiritual practices, which was a challenge because I wasn’t aware that healing could occur without medical intervention. I know now that supporting my whole body works. I take supplements, such as magnesium, vitamin D,…

Your most common cause of stress is feeling like you’re: ■ Not in control • Being fake ◆ Not coping ♥ Not approved of 2 Life is easier when you feel: ◆ Safe • Focused ■ In control ♥ Popular 3 You know you have made it through a tough time when you: ♥ Start to feel like yourself again ◆ Feel like anything is possible • Feel excited about the future ■ Wake up calm and happy 4 For you, the hardest thing about transition is not knowing: ♥ Who you are any more ◆ What the worst-case scenario could be • Where to focus your energies ■ What mood you’ll wake up in Transition is always easier when you feel: • Sure of the future ◆ On safe…

• THIS COCONUT and soy wax candle is vegan, handmade and natural. The brand supports the work of wildlife hospital Tiggywinkles. English Meadow candle, £12, brambleandblossom.co.uk • VOTED OUR READERS’ CHOICE, the panel loved this candle. Its natural soy wax and essential oils promise a good night’s sleep. Dream candle, £38, kissthemoon.com • MADE FROM COCONUT and sox wax, this candle wins our Editor’s Choice award. It is vegan-friendly, cruelty-free and contains no palm oil. Botanical wax candle, £14, bloomtown.co.uk • THIS SOY WAX candle is natural and packaged plastic-free. The brand supports the work of the mental health charity Mind. Natural candle, £18, morganjost.co.uk • OUR ECO CHAMPION, this candle is a vegan-friendly blend of soy and UK-grown rapeseed wax. It is cruelty-free and natural. Elm Rd. candle, £34,…

OUR BODIES CHANGE as we travel through life and trousers are often the first wardrobe casualty. It’s easy to feel despondent when the waist no longer fits or the style no longer suits, but that’s where the fun lies. Conversion means we can reimagine old trousers into ‘new’ garments, tailored to make us feel fabulous all over again. Kellyann Saunders, manager of an Oxfam store, is my kind of woman. For her, fashion is all about making a statement. She came to me with two pairs of trousers. ‘I’ve had them both for 10 years but never worn them because neither fit me,’ said Kellyann. ‘I love the “sparkliness” of one and the print of the other so, every now and then, I take them out of my wardrobe, have…

SPRING IS HERE, which means longer days and – hopefully – less mud. Still, I am haunted by last month’s claggy walk, so I reject my first choice of a river path – flood alert! – and choose a shorter route on higher ground. I am learning… I am learning in other ways too. Our walks so far have been to places we can reach by train, which is good for the environment and my stress levels. For me, the task of driving out of London and back would negate any psychological benefits of a walk. Now, I am honing the journeys as well – today’s walk, in an unsung pocket of Kent, is only 40 minutes by rail, and costs less than £10 return. We are just outside the…

1 How Did We Get Here? FriendsofPsychologies ClaudiaWinkleman andTanya Byron have gone from strength to strength with this insightful,yet lighthearted,look at mostly parent and child relationships. Winkleman is great at posing the questions listeners want to ask,while Byron worksJedi-like magic and unravels the knots of each situation.Each episode has a take-home insight for me. 2 Where Should We Begin? Relationship expert and author of Mating In Captivity Esther Perel has created a podcast from her couples counselling sessions in NewYork.Whether you’re struggling with a romantic problem or simply have an interest in the lives and loves of others,this podcast (and Perel’s engaging Flemish accent) is so compelling that I often find myself rewinding to double-check that I heard something correctly! 3 Trust Issues Rachel Botsman, author of WhoCanYou…

DETOX AND RESET Jiva Healing, Turkey Set in a nook of exceptional natural beauty, where tall pines and thatched bungalows sit alongside dusky mountains and a marvellously clear ocean for swimming, these clever retreats combine a juice fast and yoga with nutrition and plant-based cookinglessons.Retreatsrunfrom11to18Mayand28September to 5 October in Turkey, and on other dates in other locations. Review queenofretreats.com/retreats/jiva-healing-retreats-turkey • jivahealing.com ANTIDOTE TO URBAN LIFE Green Farm Spa & Retreats, Kent In the heart of the Kent countryside, Green Farm offers luxurious retreats that can be personalised to meet individual needs. From calming weekends, with relaxing treatments, restorative yoga and nourishing food, to energising breaks packed with nature walks, outdoor activities and indulgent, home-cooked meals, retreats are different at Green Farm. Review queenofretreats.com/retreats/ green-farm-spa-retreatskent-england • greenfarmkent.co.uk HOLISTIC CARE Maison…

There is something so soothing about settling down to a bowl of nourishing soup after a brisk walk in the early spring air. It’s quick, easy, packed full of vitamins and minerals and a thrifty way to use up any leftover vegetables. Why not check out local veg-box schemes and have fresh ingredients delivered to your door? Soup is good for body and soul and ideal for cooking in batches, so there’s always a portion in the freezer. It’s the best comfort food there is, whatever the weather.…

Spring is upon us. ‘The Earth is like a child that knows poems,’ says Rainer Maria Rilke so beautifully of the new season on page 32. I took a big leap, downsized and moved onto a canal boat last summer and, after a soggy winter, I’m looking forward to the first beams of sunshine, warmth and longer, lighter days. One thing in life that is certain is change. This issue, we explore how we handle transition and, in our Dossier, we delve deeply into one change all women go through, the menopause (page 52). Our new Celebrity and Podcast Editor, Rachel Dobson, chats to the fabulous Mariella Frostrup about modern womanhood, HRT and the books that helped her through periods of transition in her life (page 18). Rachel also launches…

AS I WAS SITTING breastfeeding and reading Psychologies, I had to submit this photograph. This is my seven-week-old daughter clasping her 89-year-old great-grandma’s finger. I’m grateful to have such an amazing family and feel moved to be able to share this pic with you. Four generations of unconditional love. Charlotte WOULD YOU LIKE to showcase your photographic talent in ‘Psychologies’? What moment has made you feel inspired, grateful or moved this month? Capture it and tell us why. We’ll print the winner, plus you’ll receive a six-month subscription and access to our Life Leap Club! Share your photograph with us and explain its inspiration on Instagram @psychologiesmagazine with the hashtag #PsychologiesPhoto or you can email letters@psychologies.co.uk…

IT’S COMMON knowledge that gratitude improves happiness, but research indicates that it might also enhance intelligence. Scientists at the Catholic University of Milan studied the brains and intellectual performance of friends who were asked to exchange gifts at the beginning of a cognitive task. The purpose was to see what effect, if any, gratitude would have on performance. The researchers found that sharing gifts, which presumably facilitated feelings of gratitude, had a measurable effect.* There was an increase in cognitive performance, but exchanging gifts also had an impact on participants’ brain networks associated with clearer thinking and memory. It could therefore be true that creating a habit of showing appreciation, for even the small things in life, might help us think more clearly and effectively. Join ‘Psychologies’ kindness tsar, David…

On the day I first put my son into my mother’s arms, I realised I loved them in a similar way. The love between me and my baby was instant and unconditional, I did not question how much he loved me and I had no reservations about giving him everything I possibly could. It wasn’t until I saw my son and mother together that I knew my love for her was the same – because I had only known her for 10 months. I had imagined meeting the woman who gave birth to me for 30 years. Before it finally happened, I had practised what I wanted to say and thought up what I needed to hear so many times that I shouldn’t have had to think. But, once face…

Q What to ’s invite the best a way family member to attend counselling›with us? The most effective way to start this conversation would be along the lines of: ‘I am concerned about X. We (be specific about who is attending therapy) are seeing a family therapist and we wondered whether you may be able to help us. The therapist says it would be useful to get as many points of view as possible and we feel we are missing your thoughts and feelings on the subject. The therapist would be happy to talk to you on the phone, if you would like, before you attend, and can answer any questions you may have.’ Q What we take steps if a family can member isn’t speaking to us? Are you…

Life is not linear in the way that I expected it to be. I’ve been made redundant three times, which is more than I would have wanted. I have done a lot of different jobs, from running a dating agency to making documentaries, but I can join the dots backwards to see how it was all preparing me for what I do today. What I value most in life is open-mindedness and curiosity. I ended up in this career because of a two-minute conversation. Growing up in Lincolnshire, we were the only Indians in the village. My parents were part of the exodus from Uganda when their families were thrown out by Idi Amin in 1972. My grandfather took a job as a lorry driver for Scunthorpe Steelworks. This resulted…

• Remember change-maker and writer Mac Macartney’s words: ‘You can do vastly more than you imagine you can.’ • Move through your tension and choose to do something, however small. We can affect what happens to us, even if we can’t control everything that happens. • We all have a contribution to make in our own way. • Creative acts of any form are much more fulfilling than forever holding back. • Don’t try and do it all and let go of the mindset that says you should. • Focus on forms of activism that energise you. Ask yourself: what do I care about passionately? What can I be in service of? What are the skills, qualities, knowledge and experience that make up my unique gift to the cause? What…

BEFORE MY 50th birthday, I plunged into depression. It coincided with my children leaving home, winding up my business and caring for my mum – spinning like a satellite around everyone else’s life but with little meaning and purpose of my own. I discovered I was perimenopausal. My periods were regular and I had no other symptoms but a visit to a private GP revealed I was oestrogen dominant, and I was prescribed bioidentical progesterone. As my symptoms changed to include more predictable clues, such as hot flushes and weight changes, my medication has been tweaked to include testosterone (game changer for the sex drive!), DHEA and oestrogen gel, which has helped regulate the internal central heating. The services of a private specialist is a privilege that has meant everything…

AFTER MY HYSTERECTOMY, due to endometriosis and ovarian cysts, I went into surgically induced menopause, which was a shock. It is a crime that women are not better prepared for the fallout after their ovaries are removed – I know many women who are not offered follow-up treatment of HRT or alternatives. While the physical symptoms have been difficult – hot flushes, loss of energy and thinning hair – the most challenging aspect has been mental. It’s like your engine, the thing that makes you you has gone and you are plunged into depression, anxiety and crippling overwhelm overnight. I got myself back on track through HRT (I use gel), and I am careful with nutrition and exercise. I take targeted multivitamins for the menopause, ashwagandha for mood and turmeric…

Great all round EcoYoga’s mat is made from natural rubber and jute – inspired by Scotland’s former jute industry – with no PVC or plastic. The mat’s packaging is minimal and plastic-free. EcoYoga is also certified by Blue Patch, The Good Shopping Guide and the Ethical Company Organisation. • EcoYoga jute mat, £42, ecoyoga.co.uk “Knowing the product is natural made me feel more connected to my practice and to nature”LIZ, reader panellist, West Sussex Get a grip Yogi Bare’s mat offers excellent grip and is made from rubber and PU. The design is inspired by the ocean and a percentage of sales supports the marine conservation society, Sea Shepherd. Our testers said the mat was great quality and super grippy. • Yogi Bare Lunar Paws yoga mat, £56.95, yogi-bare.co.uk premium…

THAT’S WHY EACH product is carefully scrutinised by our Eco Living Editor Ellen Tout to ensure it meets our standards.The chosen products are then tested by our panel of 25 discerning readers to be rated and reviewed.We will only ever include brands we really trust – if it doesn’t match up,it’s not getting in! Cuts out plastic Vegan-friendly and cruelty-free Natural and organic Sustainable and ethical Shows real care for the planet…

Spot on Research* found that acne causes social, psychological and emotional difficulties comparable to those caused by chronic health problems, such as epilepsy and diabetes. Thankfully, Weleda has a new range for acne-prone skin, including a refining lotion to apply under make-up, which contains willow bark, known for its anti-inflammatory, skin-healing properties. reminder Budding SPRING is the perfect time for shifting negative bias to positive.Through focusing your awareness to the abundance of life emerging from the depths of winter, you can retrain your brain to see the good, rather than the bad.This springtime, look around you at nature’s beauty: The blooming daffodils and bluebells, the birth of lambs or cries of baby foxes and blossom on once-barren trees. How does it make you feel? @aliroff QUOTES TO LIVE BY There is…

CROW POSE Kakasana One to strengthen abs and arms, this pose also works the mind by refining mental focus, transforming confidence and eliminating fear. Be brave and fly! • BEGIN STANDING with your feet together. Come up onto your tiptoes and sink to a deep squat, bum to your heels, balancing on your toes. • PLACE YOUR HANDS directly in front of you, palms down and press into the ground. Notice how close you are to the earth. • WITH YOUR TOES STILL ON THE FLOOR, lean forward to rest your knees on the back of your arms – your triceps. • ENGAGE YOUR CORE and begin to tip forward, putting your weight into your hands, pressing your knees into your triceps. Try lifting one foot from the ground, then…

1 For a wellbeing practice to have a rightful place in our lives, it must serve us on a holistic level – body, mind and heart. Consider a practice you follow – yoga, knitting or spending time with a certain person. Ask: ‘How does it make me feel in my body?’ Does your body feel relaxed? Healthy? Or are there physical sensations of anxiety surrounding the practice? 2 Now ask: ‘How does it make me feel in my mind?’ Does it support your mental wellbeing? Does it interest, or even bore, you? 3 Finally, ask: ‘How does it feel in my heart?’ Does it make your heart sing, or sink? 4 Look at your answers. Are the three holistic elements, body, mind and heart, being served? If one isn’t, what…

YOU GOT SOMETHING TO SAY TO ME? THERE ARE VOICES in my head wherever I go – on the train to work, walking the dog, driving and when I’m pounding the pavements on my late-night runs. They’re funny, factual, fascinating, insightful and sometimes even violent or rude. Welcome to our podcast column – in which I’ll introduce you to my podcast friends, who I love for many reasons. Some I binge on exclusively until I finish the series. One, I save for the same 45-minute journey I do every Saturday (I savour the ritual of plugging in and hearing the familiar theme tune); others are soundtracks to walks – once, I was so engrossed, I got lost, ran out of phone battery and came home in the dark, soaked and…

Home is where one starts from’ – TS Eliot. We spend so much of our time here. It’s a space to be with loved ones, welcome friends and retreat after a hard day’s work. But what does it take to make home a happy place? In her book, Happy Starts At Home, design expert Rebecca West explains how where we live can directly affect our wellbeing, sleep and relationships, and ultimately decrease stress levels to increase all-round happiness. It’s not about buying more or relocating but working with what you’ve got to express your individuality and feel at your best. ‘Happy Starts At Home: Change Your Space, Transform Your Life’ by Rebecca West (CICO Books, £9.99)…

1 House Of Glass By Hadley Freeman (HarperCollins,£16.99) Hadley Freeman found a shoebox in her grandmother’s cupboard full of photographs and letters,including a sketch by Picasso and a picture of her gran with a stranger,all clues to secrets Sala kept all her life.In the rise of fascism,theJewish family escaped Eastern Europe for France,where they took different paths during the war. Hadley traces their footsteps, from Paris to Long Island and Auschwitz,piecing together the stories behind the memorabilia. Avivid and moving memoir. 2 A Thousand Moons By Sebastian Barry (Faber&Faber,£18.99) Winona, a Lakota orphan, is adopted by former soldier Thomas and the love of his life,John, and the three set up home with freed slaves Rosalee and Tennyson – a group threatened by violence and…

Greedy Gourmet was launched by writer and photographer Michelle Minnaar with the aim of sharing interesting recipes from around the world. You’ll find favourite go-to meals, more exotic dishes for when you’re feeling adventurous – and there’s a great selection of soups for the health-conscious and hungry (greedygourmet.com). Try spicy ‘Lebanese lentil soup’ or rustic ‘Italian sausage soup with butter beans’ – and her ‘ABC soup’ is not a kiddies’ alphabet version!…