Back Street Heroes February 2025

I don’t know if you’ve heard of her, but Baba Vanga, a blind Bulgarian mystic who died in 1996, known as the ‘Nostradamus of the Balkans’, predicted that, in 2025, humanity’ll make contact with extraterrestrial life, possibly leading to a global crisis or apocalypse, and also that we’d develop telepathy, allowing for direct mind-to-mind communication. Hmm, dunno about that, can’t really see it meself. Firstly, I reckon any self-respecting alien race’d take one look at the feckin’ mess we’ve made of the planet we live on and go: “Mm, yeah, we’ll give that one a miss, eh?” and, secondly, I don’t want mind-to-mind communication – my head’s full of enough inane bollox as it is (which, trust me, you should be eternally grateful you’re never going to know about), and…

For last year’s bash (yes, it’s 2025 now, isn’t it, even though I’m writing this in 2024, so the 2024 event was last year), meself and a bunch o’ mates’d planned to ride down together on chops and customs, while another, whose back’d not really be up to riding a hardtail all the way from East Anglia to Welsh Wales, would drive me van full of tents etm. It was all arranged, and Pam and I were both looking forward to our first long ride of the year, her on her GSX-R ratfighter and me ont’ Future Bike. Then, a few days before, driver matey announces that he’d hurt his wrist at work, and wasn’t going to be up to driving from one side o’ the country to the other.…

“I want to suspend an engine from the top tube of the frame so there’s no need for a front downtube,” said Don. Somebody standing at the bar joked that he could always find a cheap MZ, and they all started laughing as they all knew where to find one. “A friend used an MZ ETZ to commute to Cork, until the gearbox gave him trouble, and about five years ago pushed it to the back of his shed.” Ireland isn’t known for its dry climate, and the ETZ was looking a bit sorry as they dragged it out of the shed. “When I stripped the engine the gudgeon pin’d almost welded itself to the piston, and the crankshaft was only good for scrap. At least the barrel and head could…

SO, for the 2024 article, I’m just going to say thank you to the following: Pam, Agi, Jo, and Loon for their, and others too, help on the gate; to all the Ogri MCC who allow us disreputable ‘erberts to descend on their clubhouse and environs and genuinely lower its tone; to Dolly and all her staff at Goody’s Bakery for all their hard work and excellent food; to The Jellyheads and Exhibit A for playing storming sets on the Friday and Saturday nights respectively; and to all the disreputable ‘erberts who turn up from far and wide and make this the event I’ve been to most over all my years of biking – thank you! And now, I’m going to give Gareth space to use pics really big, and…

When I was old enough, it was big twins I started with, but not American ones - a Suzuki TL1000R. I was a bit of a speed freak, the faster the better, and the bike ended up with a turbo and a ton of engine work, and the aim was to reach 200mph. I didn’t quite get that far, but not far off, but after scaring myself half to death in the process, I decided that if I wanted to live, I needed to slow down. Around 2016 or ’17 I bought my first Harley, an 883 Sportster, and instantly regretted it as the best I could get out of it was 80mph, which was a bit of a comedown. It was fun though, and I found myself with a…

Paul Jones, the owner and builder of this’ere Bandit-engined hardtail streetfighter, is well aware of the latest fashions in custom bike building; of bikes that look like refugees from the late ’50s to the late ’70s; of dark blue jeans wi’ turn-ups; of the resurgence of rock n’ roll at bike events an’ all that but, as someone who harkens back to the ’90s, not the ’70s, doesn’t really see that any of it’s relevant to him. He’s got a very tough matt black GPX750 (monoshock, three-spokes, Sporty tank, cut-down frame) that was featured in 100% Biker back in the 2000s, but he’d always wanted a ’90s-style streetfighter/drag-style chop as those were the bikes he’d drooled over growing up. He’s been building for years and, like the rest of us,…